Frustrated!

I know I’m posting this under progress but it feels like a lack of progress. I know I have not post anything since my one year follow up with my cardiologist but I have not been able to move past feeling discouraged. My lab work for my doctors appointment and subsequent EKG and stress echo indicate that my vegan diet has virtually reversed my condition and you really can’t tell I ever had a heart attack. Something I should celebrate right? Wrong! My doctor was more concerned about my weight loss or the lack thereof. He did not get the results he expected from me starting the Esselstyn program and quite frankly neither has dr. Esselstyn. While you can’t look at me an tell that I have has a heart attack I’m not at my ideal weight therefore I’m at risk for another heart attack. And it seems like no matter what I do the weight stays. I was told to remove flour from my already restrictive vegan diet I tried for three weeks and lost four lbs the first week and nothing more. I have removed processed foods and increased my salad intake and my skin looks great but no movement on the scale. I’m frustrated and I don’t know what else to do. Even working out isn’t making a difference. My doctors want me to weigh between 130-140lbs. I know those of you who follow me have no clue what I look like but trust me if I lose that much weight I will just be boobs and long hair. The only upside I have is that I have reduced the amount of medication I’m taking because I’m healthier courtesy of my vegan diet. And then my medical insurance company kicks me in the teeth with a letter to let me know they are raising my premium from high as hell to astronomical. I feel like no matter what I do I can’t win the war only a battle here and there. I can’t seem to keep a workout buddy which would help me a great deal as my dog is tired of walking a mile with me and runs from me when I get her leash. I communicate with for a living so when people ask me what I need and I say I need you to work out with me I really mean it. I know thats what it takes for me to go to the gym. I can tell you what I need unless its related to money I’m not going to ask I will just lose everything move into a cardboard box never tell you or let you come over. I did not enjoy having a heart attack, I have no clue how my dad had several of these as passed them off for indigestion-I don’t want to have anymore of them but I don’t know what else to do. My goal weight for my self is 30lbs. More then dr. Esselstyn wants. I hear and read about people’s dramatic weight loss after changing to a vegan diet and I’m still waiting for mine. My doctors don’t understand why it isn’t happening and neither do I. Some people just look at me like I’m insane because I have a 32% BMI and I just need to make it to 26% and their BMI is a lot higher. But what they don’t understand is I have has a heart attack and they have not. For most people the first heart attack ends in death and with each additional heart attack the heart muscle weakens. I don’t want to have another heart attack. To do what I’m being told to do and not have the results I’m told I should be having is very frustrating. So I have not posted because I have not cooked anything worth mentioning, after discussing my lack of weight loss I didn’t much feel like celebrating my almost perfect lab results. I’m frustrated and don’t know what else to do…

27 Dec This entry was published on December 27, 2012 at 4:51 AM. It’s filed under Progress and tagged Esselstyn, forks over knives, Heart Attack, Heart health, Plant strong. Bookmark the permalink. Follow any comments here with the RSS feed for this post.